Man Regrets Telling Wife He Can’t Last Without Her
In a recent Reddit entry posted on r/relationship_advice, user u/get-a-lifee shared a post with the caption “told my wife (F35) she couldn’t do it if I don’t have (M34). It turns out that he can.”
In the post, the author shared that his wife, who is currently on vacation from work, spends every day except Monday and Friday (when she can get childcare) with their children. “We had children knowing that she wanted to be a working mother. So it’s been a change… to say the least,” he said.
After a day when his wife talked about taking care of their children (along with the children of their neighbors), the poster said that he asked him to take over when he came back from work to give him a break.
“I don’t have a good answer,” he admitted. “I made excuses and didn’t offer help and for the first time in years my wife got angry and cursed at me.”
“He sat me down and wrote a list of things I had done for the family that day and compared it to him…longer list, I apologize,” the poster added. “He accepted and I thought things would go back to normal. They haven’t.”
The man got his wish, and he did not enjoy it
The app user shared that his wife “used to include [him] of parenting our children,” saying “I dance most weeks and sleep time is split. I took a bath. Made dinner. All things.”
But “since [their] fight, [his] the wife did not ask [him] for any help with children. The first morning [he] woke up to what should have been my morning with the kids, [he] Thought he was just being nice or trying to prove a point but it kept happening.
He no longer had anything to do with their bedtimes, and all “his” child-rearing work was taken over by his wife, he said. And he says that “the children don’t even notice. It’s like he replaced me.”
In the resulting argument, the man said his wife accused him of not having contact with their children unless he arranged it. In response, he “said something along the lines of ‘I want to see how long you can last without me.'”
He managed it well
“He started running again. She cooks healthy and often. Every night I come home to my perfectly happy Stepford wife, doing everything without me and feeling empty,” the poster said.
He added that he is not happy with her positive development because he is now out of her life. “At this point I want to beg him to go back to the way things are,” he said. “This is not what we agreed upon.”
People have, well, opinions
“Don’t wait for your wife to ask for help with your children. If you are an active parent, you should not be asked to ‘help.’ It’s a shared responsibility,” said one commentator.
“This is why women check relationships. He doesn’t need to manage you. You are a mature ass man who has the ability to take a responsibility for his children,” added another.
“He was angry because his fantasy of being a good husband and father was shattered. His ego took a hit. He never minded that he created more work for his wife by not pulling his weight. He doesn’t care about his children without a father,” one person said.
In a recent edit of the post, the man shared that he considered the comments and gave his wife a bath, put her favorite music on Alexa and told her to rest with the children.
“Relationships are difficult. And people are not perfect,” he said at the end of his post. You can say it again…