The Omniscient Judiciary: Masters of all in the Hills Republic

Judges are not just legal minds; they are also top-level economists, scientists, urban planners, environmentalists and, perhaps, clairvoyants.

By Khurram Chughtae

In the illustrious Republic of the Hills National Park, where justice reigns supreme – quite literally – the Judicial Branch stands as the bewitching beacon of justice, holding the delicate threads of government. If the other branches of government ever forget their place, the judiciary is there to remind them gently – or not so gently. Headed by none other than the omniscient Chief Judge of the Supreme Court, this bench of legal luminaries has gracefully descended from the lofty heights of jurisprudence to oversee everything from local government elections to town planning.

We must marvel at the constitutional ballet performed by the judges of the Republic of Hills, where the trichotomy of power is honored with such talent. After all, who needs checks and balances when you have a judiciary that knows no boundaries, as the wise arbiters of the Republic’s fate? These judges are not just legal minds; they are also top-level economists, scientists, urban planners, environmentalists and, perhaps, clairvoyants. His expertise covers many disciplines, making him the ultimate polymath, whose wisdom transcends mere earthly limitations.

In its divine wisdom, the Supreme Court recently organized a population control conference, because, of course, who better to address birth rates than judges in suits? I firmly believe that the citizens of the Republic of Hills should stay at home, eat at home, and, above all, not multiply outside the meticulously preserved borders of the Master Plan. Unlike those “so-called” advanced jurisdictions that have the audacity to adapt their urban strategies, Hills Republic remains proudly attached to its original vision, untouched by time or progress.

And let’s not forget the environment. The Judiciary of the Republic of the Hills doesn’t just interpret the law – they interpret the land. They are the custodians of Agri, forests, fauna, and all green things, ensuring that every tree, rock, and blade of grass is counted. His review of Environmental Impact Assessments (EIAs), Spatial Impact Assessments, and ecological footprint studies is unparalleled. The judges possess superhuman abilities to evaluate and determine the ecological and biodiversity impact of a single building that measures a few thousand square feet in a National Park that stretches hundreds of thousands of hectares. Naturally, the thousands of homes built by Martians and other extraterrestrials escape their scrutiny, as only such extraordinary entities can evade the supernatural powers of the Hills Republic judges.

These judges fight climate change with the precision of a surgeon, dissecting every public project and development to ensure that the Republic remains as it always was.

Their commitment to climate resilience is so fierce that they have even advocated for the demolition of buildings based on the clear and distinct determination that a restaurant in a hill station in a National Park poses an existential threat. It is also widely reported that many of the Hills Republic judges have visited national parks in more developed jurisdictions. There, they were shocked to find no commercial restaurants, forcing them to survive on indigenous food or meals cooked by the locals. The poor judges, with no other option, now bring a “Mitti ki Ketli” for tea with a duration of a week and “Aloo Paratha” tiffins that last a month – because, of course, no National Park in the world has hotels. or restaurants. Their nights are spent both in tents and in the houses of locals with a history of residence of a century.

These judges also boast doctoral degrees in development and infrastructure planning. They adjudicate on mass transit and new human housing projects with unmatched expertise. They are so skilled in the council of the community that they can be influenced by the testimony of one or two individuals out of thousands, deciding that the rest must perish or moved to another planet. In their wisdom, they discourage new developments, believing that converting agricultural land into real estate empires (which some mistakenly call human settlements), ensures food security. Alas, no one expected to inform the judges of the actual proportion of arable land to the percentage of cultivated land.

So, fear not, citizens of Hills Republic! With such an enlightened judiciary, you are in safe hands. The rule of law reigns supreme, as long as it is interpreted by those who know best – the judges. And be sure, they never exceed their limits, because they are not emperors. They are simply the wise, benevolent overseers of your destiny.

Still, with his ever-expanding repertoire of supernatural abilities, who knows what’s next? Perhaps one day, the greatest judge in charge of the Republic of Hills will convene a summit with a great agenda: to develop a new law of physics, because gravity, like justice, must project to his wisdom. After all, when you’re indispensable to the very fabric of the universe, why stop at just ruling the Republic?

The writer is a Strategic Consultant with a focus on public policy Governance with an aim to transform the traditional style of governance Colonial system of governance to a Smart Governance Ecosystem for All © @Chughtae